If Da Noh Soh…

Basic English for dummies…

You can call him an idiot, a moron, a dodo-bird or a complete nincompoop. You can even call him intellectually stunted, foolish, barely coherent, illiterate or plain dumb. What you should never call him is intelligent or competent. In deference to the first lady second wife, we’ll just call him ‘mi bally.’ Today Deputy Prime Minister Gaspar Vega was on television giving his Christmas message. One of his PR persons needs to be fired forthwith. Gaspar Vega is not meant to do that sort of thing. He doesn’t sound very good…really. Might give people listening the impression that our country is being run by a bunch of dimwits. Me and the staff at the Belize Times decided that we’ll pool our meager resources and get the DPM a copy of Basic English for Dummies. We can’t promise that we’ll stick around to sing carols or drink eggnog, but that gift will be delivered early Christmas morning, courtesy your friends in the PUP…If Da Noh Soh!

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It’s the law…stupid!

And speaking about stupid, Gapi has a notice in the latest gazette in which he is taking away one single lot. The reason he gives is that he is acquiring it for a public purpose. What the hell kind of public purpose would one lot serve? The Attorney-General has been heard to remark far and wide that the Deputy Prime Minister and Minister of Lands is a very stupid man who just can’t seem to understand that you just can’t go taking away people’s land for no reason whatsoever. Sedi said he is tired of trying to explain what is right and wrong and legal to Gapi, cause the man seems to have no sense whatsoever…If Da Noh Soh!

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Can you speak Hebrew?

Then again, who’s the Attorney-General to talk about stupid? He is the man who just basically told Guatemala that our borders don’t really mean anything, that they are artificial anyway and we are all one people. Shouldn’t surprise us anymore what Sedi does. Just the other day he signed a document with the government of Israel. When asked about the details of the agreement Sedi didn’t seem to really have a clue. Well no wonder…the document which Sedi signed was written completely in Hebrew. So up to now, nobody really has a clue what we promised to Israel. That’s a scary thought…If Da Noh Soh!

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$1million fence…

Have you passed around the Marion Jones complex lately? You have…well then you’ve seen the fence which is going up around the compound. That fence will cost Belizean taxpayers a little more than $1million dollars. You read that right…$1 million for a fence. People are starving right now and the economy is in recession and we’re paying $1million for a fence. And that’s because the work on the actually facility hasn’t even started yet. Hell, what’s wrong with our priorities? Word is that the contractor is close family to Miss Wallace who is the CEO in the Prime Minister’s office, so it’s still being kept all in the family…If Da Noh Soh!

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No thank you…

Big Momma got a dose of her own nasty medicine on Sunday at the PGIA. Seems the PM re-entered the country but there was some snafu at the office and the driver was late. So there’s the PM tapping his foot impatiently while he waits, and some poor soul trying to help calls the sour-faced one. So she jumps in the Infiniti and hightails it to the PGIA, lights flashing and brakes squealing as she pulls up in front of the PM. She jumps out of the vehicle and panting and breathless and says…can I give you a lift, Boss? So Dean looked down his nose at her and says…that’s okay, I’ll just wait for my driver. Ouch for Big Momma. She hung her head, jumped back into her Infiniti and drove very slowly away. Nobody likes you, Big Momma, can’t you tell…If Da Noh Soh!

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