Fonso’s Identity Crisis

I have learned over the years that those promoting and heading the United Democratic Party are a set of vindictive and malicious people. They are willing to do anything and whatever it costs to cling to power even if it means morally killing someone. I expect nothing less of these wealthy moguls who put themselves, riches and power before the larger population. One just has to recall the unparliamentarily behavior of the Prime Minister on several occasions, spurring rude and foul languages. Their behavior comes as no surprise to many, but what is disgusting and unprofessional to the Belizean people are the continued personal attacks written in a section of the UDP Newspaper, El Guardian.  Attacks on the Opposition from the ruling party and vice versa is no strange behavior in Belizean politics, but the foul language and the personal attacks is what is unacceptable.

You will find out that I don’t generally waste my time answering to newspapers opinions and comments, especially when it comes from rags like the UDP newspaper. What I will not waste an opportunity to do, though, is to correct individuals who are quick to write the untrue, inventing lies to brand people without looking at themselves (both as individuals and as a group).  Alfonso (the real ‘shim’ from the UDP newspaper) loves to continuously referring to private citizens as “sketels.” Alfonso goes on to pen weekly that the writer of this column has a gender crisis. I have no problem if Fonso feels that way, but I am obliged to inform him that it is in fact the other way around; and in the process disappointing him for not belonging to his club. You see Alfonso, I have allowed you to write as you please because I don’t lack “dangling appendages” as compared to your PM; something the rejected Zenaida is paying dearly for revealing.

Alfonso claims that there are those of us who have an identity crisis. Well again, fortunately I am in my right mind and I know that I am a male, but how about him? And speaking about feminine behavior, it is advisable for you not to travel down that road. For those of us who have known about your sexual preferences for many years now, we have decided to keep it out of politics in an effort to support your ‘inner you,’ but may I remind you that it is not surprising to us. But if your intent was to hunt for another victim, like a real skettel in full heat, well again I am sorry to disappoint you Fonso. And about your suggestion about changing the name of my column to “bend over,” don’t worry because if anyone can execute those words perfectly well that person is you, and if you don’t believe it then just ask your long time ‘friend.’

You see Alfonso, when you pen things without thinking, they can come back to haunt you. The pictures you use off my facebook are insignificant. But if you really want to see men in dress then I can send you one from the barefoot minister and see if it fits your preference. You see I got pictures of that too, but I respect the culture of San Pedro as compared to you. I know for a fact that I have no identity crisis but can you say the same? Can Belmopan John and Collet Patrick say the same? Can your female radio co-host and lady Singh say the same? One advice to you Alfonso is that if you give a licking, then I hope that you are prepared to take licking.

My intent is not to tear down Alfonso but to simple bring him back on track and save him some embarrassment that can come along in the future if he pushes for more. As a member of the Opposition and as a Belizean it is my obligation to keep issues of national importance alive, pointing out the government shortfalls, analyzing things from a different perspective as well as giving suggestion as how to improve the lives of the Belizean people. That is because I have recognized that we have no enemies, but opponents and our equal role is to combat the real enemies which includes poverty, hunger, equal opportunities and social justice and in the process making live better for all.

Editor’s Note: While I personally find references to me in the Guardian as nothing more than entertainment value, Mr. Noble as Editor must realize that there will be persons who object to the increasingly personal nature of the attacks in his rag, and those persons are entitled to a forum to voice their opinions as well. And as this columnist rightly states, if the girly-man throws licks, he better be prepared to take a licking as well.

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